With the new year comes the infamous saying, “New Year, New Me”.
Year after year we dissect ourselves with a magnifying glass and say, “Alright, what needs fixing?”
Hey, I’m guilty of it. Self-help books have been my go-to reads for years!
Ohh I need to learn how to be more organized. Now I need to learn how to use my money wisely. Crap my love life isn’t so great, I should figure out how to win a guy by being a b****.
& let’s not forget the 1894205 books out there on how to attain the ultimate body. Joy.
We are constantly judging ourselves. We keep picking away thinking it’s going to get better, but even when we accomplish that new goal, it still doesn’t feel great because we’ve already moved on to the next thing we’re not satisfied with.
This realization finally hit me the other day while I was in a yoga class.
“My flexibility needs a ton of work. Why can’t my hips just stay squared?! The girl next to me is incredible at inversions. I’m just not good enough.”
Woah there, mind!! The whole point of me doing more yoga was to de-stress from school. Why am I cluttering my brain with more self-destruction?
It’s the same thing when it comes to eating healthy. We get so fixated on having the BEST diet that we stop enjoying ourselves and before you know it we’ve forgotten how to live.
Why exactly do we do this to ourselves?
Frankly, I blame social media for most of it. Those perfect pictures we see on Instagram have distorted our perception of what is now accepted as the norm. We are all trying to aim for something that’s been edited more times than you can even imagine. A social media rant will be saved for another blog post, though.
The judgment we put on ourselves doesn’t even come close to the criticism we get from the meanest strangers.
I know that accepting that you are enough doesn’t happen over night. I do, however, think that with patience, mindfulness, and gratitude, it can be achieved.
I’m in no way saying we shouldn’t have goals. We need goals! How else are we to push ourselves to our utmost potential?
The problem is when we don’t feel as though what we are at this very moment is enough. If you don’t love yourself right now, your desire to better yourself will turn into a downward spiral. If you don’t fully achieve something, you end up tearing yourself apart for it.
Judgment is only useful when it’s based on logic and impartiality. The minute your thoughts lead to self-pity, you’re headed towards negative energy, where you will only give yourself more things to hate.
If you do feel yourself going down this path of self-judgment, be aware of it. Try to understand where it’s coming from and shift it to a more positive, loving light.
Most importantly, be kind to yourself. Treat yourself how you treat others. Chances are the judgments you place on yourself are far more harsh than those you place on others. Learn to love yourself just as much as you love those around you, and mean it. Be grateful for your health and well-being. You are enough.
Do you guys ever feel like you’re going through this downward spiral of self-judgment? How do you get out of it? Would love to hear your thoughts on all of this.
Until next time. XO